W e have been looking at healthy relationships in personal and professional life using reflections on the knowledge of self and others when engaging and connecting within relationships in complex and healthy situations.In particular we have been considering such dynamics relative to the current situations arising from and within the pandemic. Allied to this we have briefly considered the concept of ‘the wounded healer’ which,whilst having been around and named for centuries it has more and more come into the public domain. It is not acceptable to call or relate to oneself as a wounded healer without accepting responsibility for self and client care to avoid damage to the client and contamination of the worker.
Arising out of the aforementioned concepts are quality therapeutic methods which can be learned by individuals and groups and which I believe have significant and useful relevance for our upcoming situations as we emerge out of this last lock-down. Whilst based on a Jungian style philosophy I am applying them to this situation where mental health has been affected on a global scale.
The techniques I am discussing are not to be used for psychotic patients. but for those who are in control of themselves and grounded in reality
Self knowing is a concept which emerges through various philosophies of life, and needs to be undertaken in a sensible and balanced way as we are limited in our ability to know all of ourselves and will always have unconscious dimensions to our being. Many people undertake a journey to self awareness through an engagement in personal or group therapy, or in following a guide who has already followed a path themselves and have given us road maps for the journey, one such person is of course ‘Jesus’ .
Central to self awareness is that ‘Self knowing’ facilitates the development of compassion for self and others, that is if undertaken and used purposefully, the problem is often people undertake a form of this and become arrogant and overinflated with power because they do not use the knowledge it brings to integrate new and genuine ways of living setting aside unhealthy denial and refusal to accept their weaknesses. By this I mean they ‘jump on the bus’ and do not pay their fare, what is needed is reflection on knowledge gained and an integration for growth and development.
If we consider it as a gaining or growing a picture of ourselves we might think of a jigsaw with an emerging beauty but with missing parts or parts damaged and not fitting too well together.
Living a purposeful and ‘aware’ life also enables us to take responsibility for how we live and act, and to develop appropriate morals challenging norms and mores which are ingrained within us and our society. This reflection is just raising some very important and pertinent issues regarding healthy and informed living and will, I’ m sure stir many more up in the coming days.
A simple way to understand growing into ourselves to live harmoniously is to imagine we are made up of many parts just like an orchestra , if the wind section or any other part of the orchestra is not in tune the harmony is impaired, the greater the damage the greater the impairment. Within each of our personalities there are impairments from trauma and general life suffering, and from living in an unexamined and irresponsible way. In an orchestra the manager is ‘the ego’ calling attention to the unharmonious instruments and arranging their repair to restore harmony. So it is in ‘awareness living’ we need to learn about our parts of self, and deal with the parts that are out of harmony so that we live in a harmonious and healthy way.
This week I felt accompanied by a presence particularly on my left side, now I’m quite sane so don’t run away. Sometimes we need someone to walk beside us and sometimes when friends and loved ones pray for us or send us love and light we can actually feel their presence beside us- alongside us. However awareness or examined living means we first of all need to walk beside ourselves managing our daily living with knowledge, balance and common sense so that we can respond to the many calls to walk beside the other person with compassion and awareness of his/her rights, needs and dignity.
I hope you can feel the supportive presence walking beside you and that you take it into yourself and integrate it to give you harmony, and an ability to walk beside the other.
GET GOING WALK!
aoibheann thoughtful reflections 