CARING AND DEBRIEFING

Understanding caring and debriefing is not simply an intellectual excercise but a personal understanding of human beings methods of making attachments and connections, in both the physical and mental spheres.

It is frequently the case that carers, pastors, therapists, and many other persons in front line care have evolved into the work due to unresolved issues in their own lives,or unknown to them they are carrying and re-inacting the trauma of past generations.If such behaviour is not challenged and understood it continues down the generations ad infinitum, accordingly when carers or other front line workers engage with each other without appropriate knowledge of self they put both themselves and their clients at risk.

Holding and containment are required for both physical and mental caring, but pause a moment and reflect these abilities depend on you and I offering ourselves with knowledge as to what we can contain and hold, and recognising the engagement as having an effect build up on the worker.

A simple analogy is if you and I each visualise a box in front of us which contains or own problems and issues, if you are the client requiring care it is possibly the case that your box is full, and in some cases may be overflowing, whilst if I am the carer my box needs to be possibly half empty in order to contain your overwhelming issues and restore your equilibrium. Often this is where the engagement ends, the worker walks away and keeps on loading up the metaphorical box without emptying it through some confidential debriefing or supervision or carer support.

It seems to me that in this country we have an idea of standards that have little basis in common sense when we actually stop to think about them. Such standards are induced within the cultural norms and mores of our country, families, philosophy or religion. How often do you hear, ‘I should or I could have down that’ many times in the most ridiculous sense. We are not Gods but mortals carrying about our own issues and needing to be supported and debriefed from our stresses.

The current caption’we are all in this together’ is beginning to stick in my craw, and I fervently hope that this conjures up in responsible minds the need for self care, but so often the picture in my mind is of masses of people in a huge lake being attacked by snakes with people walking by and passing no remarks.

The unnatural behaviour of ‘lockdowns’ and restrictions have taken many back to survival tactics but there is a bit lost appropriate caring and respect for each other. appropriate empathy and compassion for human life, and when this is experienced by the truly empathic person the loss is almost umbearable and causes huge stress.

However having acknowledged this I think we need to examine ourselves for arrogance.Who do you think you are,? who do I think I am?lets check the issues in ‘our boxes’ debrief in order to reduce stress.

DONT JUMP IN THE LAKE!